Lie number 1.
My mother’s life informed my own, primarily as over-compensation, which now I’m finding wasn’t worth the sacrifices at all. It’s sad but true.
There was no point to making a way for women, I just worked harder for less pay. Relived the trauma of abuse every day of my former career by working predominantly for abusive bosses, which in my experience are the majority. Why is that? I don’t know and I no longer care, just let me go through the motions of life. I’m tired of being a woman who gets told she’s wrong, underestimated, undervalued and dismissed.
If [as a woman] you venture into traditional male territory, the abuse comes anyway. It’s not what you say that prompts it—it’s the fact that you are saying it.
Lie number 2.
You can have it all. In fact, you won’t get anything. How’s that?
I also don’t think therapy will work on me. It’s just too late in life. It’s pointless. I felt that today.
I’m pretty much pointless, living out pointless days.
Lie number 3
And anything else I can imagine, I can achieve.
Nope, sorry kid. If anyone had told me that, I wouldn’t have listened anyway, I wanted to believe so badly, and why was I given such powerful willpower if not to prove the whole world wrong?
Well, guess what? I don’t have it in me anymore. Beating my head against the wall. Just wondering why the hell i am even here, no ties to anyone or anything, just empty.